Holy cow, you still need more ways to drink stealthily? You might actually have a few problems. Fortunately, we could care less about your problems and instead we are going to focus on drinking. Let's get to work.


Today's Stealth Drinking post is a how-to on making a secret flask book. It is shown in movies, comics, and cartoons constantly ("No wonder they call it the good book" - Homer Simpson drinking from a flask hidden in a bible). You might have thought they were clever and that it takes a God-blessed genius to craft one. Well, you are a God-blessed simpleton to think so. Do you have a few minutes? Sure you do, you're on the internet.

1) Get a big book. You will need at least 300 pages (1" of paper). Find a big book on clearance at your library for $.50 and be done with it. I found an old Ozzy Osbourne biography book that was not getting any attention.

2) Glue the pages together on the outside. I used rubber cement, as the brush strokes leave the edges clean. You could theoretically use any regular white glue, but why man? Rubber cement keeps the pages bendy while holding them together!

3) Put your flask on the book and outline it. Then start cutting away. I used a regular utility knife without a straightedge. It shows. If you want a pro-looking book, use a straightedge on every cut. Keep cutting out pages until your flask fits in the crevice and the book closes properly.

4) Sand out the inside. You took the time to make it, you might as well make it look decent. All those tattered, cut hang-nails look terrible. If you tried to impress me with that shoddy work, I would laugh in your face and ask your sister if she's doing anyone anything tomorrow night.

5) Apply a layer of glue inside the book along the cut edges. This will keep the pages intact even more and make the overall product bearable to view. You know what? Apply a couple layers. These things tend to fall apart. Do it.

Last tips: Choose an uninteresting book to desecrate. If you have a strong hatred towards an old textbook, go for it! Won't it feel awesome tearing out those pages and then hiding your booze from anyone with a conscience? 

If you have a small bar area setup in your place, find an appropriate looking book to stand next to those bottles. It will class-up the place and you will appear more knowledgeable, because we all hate those book-smart, history-buff bar crawlers always trying to one-up your wits.

Good luck and be smart with your stealth drinking. We know you are out there, but no one else has to. Keep it that way.



Check out our other Stealth Drinking posts Part 1 and Part 2.